Born: January 1, 1985After losing Brad to Emily, I decided to have a train wreck with Bentley on national TV.
Born: February 23, 1983Someone decided to save Parks and Recreation, even though it sucked the first year.
Born: August 4, 1961I got elected as the first African American president of the United States, even though my middle name is Hussein . . . and I killed Bin Laden.
Born: January 28, 1950I was on the cover of Playboy, and on Hee Haw - talk about a diverse career.
Born: April 4, 1970I'm a Razzie winner for Worst Supporting Actor in Battlefield Earth.
Born: August 15, 1972Matt Damon made me famous, and my ability to date and marry sexy girls named Jennifer has kept me that way.
Born: November 23, 2010I hit the gene pool jackpot, but might have to worship aliens.
Born: September 15, 1981I have a website called "rejectedjokes.com". If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?
Born: November 30, 1965A physical shortie, but leader of the Frat Pack, a comic group that includes Jack Black, Will Ferrell, Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson, Steve Carell and Paul Rudd.
Born: January 1, 1983I broke Ashley Hebert's heart when I quit the show after she hooked up with me.
Born: November 4, 1970Celebrity/fame monger. I was former besties with Jill Zarin, and likes to hear myself crack jokes.
Born: September 4, 1981I'm half of the one of the coolest couples ever. Other half = JayZ.